Lost at school: Chapters 1-2

I agree with Wendy "I like how the author gave a real example of the skills and unsolved problems… " It also allowed me to understand the meaning, and how to apply it. Often times we read books,  articles,  etc. That tell us about an particular problem without how to strategize,  or get real results. Pretty much cause,  effects, but not real solutions to help deal with the current situation.

Indiana: "Intial reaction to the incident involving Joey... " I will admit,  I was pretty lost for words. I tried to picture myself as the teacher.  I tried to put myself in the dean's shoes. The principals shoes.  As well as in the parents shoes. I appreciated the authors raw honesty,  and I love how this book gave a REAL life experience. This can happy to any of us (I pray it doesn't, but if so we are prepared and safe.)

My thoughts: 
I am very impressed with the author's in depth detail of what can happen in an inclusive classroom community,  and how to approach it. The author comes on strong with the Joey incident,  but I think as future teachers we need to be exposed to this type of content. I am also impressed with how the author is approaching how to deal with challenging children. Joey definitely falls under the category of "challenging children." However, he still deserves the opportunity to have a positive learning environment that doesn't alienate him. This book is opening my eyes not only as a future teacher,  but as an parent. I am learning so much I can see myself referring back to this book in my career. I can also see myself referring others to read it.  The Author provides different strategies and information that support the challenges that occur when dealing with some children.  There was examples of different cases,  and some Q & A regarding lagging cognitive skills/unsolved problems.

Parts that really stood out to me: 

Lagging Skills-

• "There's a, spectrum of things kids do when life's demands exceed their capacity to respond adaptively..."

• "With this new perspective on challenging kids, much of what we say about them no longer make sense… " {He just wants attention;  He just wants his own way;  He's manipulating us- Competent manipulation requires various skills…; He's not motivated;  Making bad choices;  Parents are incompetent disciplinarians;  has a bad attitude;  mental illness;  sibling is the same way.} (Pg. 11-13)

Many of people often make these preconceptions about children with struggling behavioral issues. I've even witnessed teachers during my observations place some of these labels on their students as they discuss with other staff. 

I made a key note when the author states:  "Once you become comfortable with the idea that challenging kids lack important thinking skills,  these explanations no longer make much sense." (Pg. 13- Kindle Edition) 

• "One of the important task of development is to learn how to shift gears efficiently when the environment demands it. It's a skill many challenging kids do not possess." (Pg. 16)
- I like this concept. 

• "Again,  consequences only remind kids of what we don't want them to do,  and give them the incentive to do something more adaptive instead." (Pg. 18)
- So true. I definitely agree from my own childhood experience. 

•"disrespect is usually just assign that a kid is lacking important skills… if the kid could communicate in a more respectful way,  he would." (Pg.  19)

I read this and thought:  What if he does,  but still choose not too? 

"Many of kids with behavioral challenges have difficulty understanding another's perspective and appreciating how their behavior is affecting others." (Pg. 24)

- Wow I never thought about it in that way.  I always thought that maybe they choose to ignore or care how it affects others;  simply because of how they are feeling, in that current moment. 

Unsolved Problems- Key ideas:

Those lagging skills are especially problematic in specific situations. Tells us when the behavior is occurring.

New Lense And A New Tool- Key Ideas:

Providing 4 guidelines on how to approach & deal with difficulty & challenging behavior.

Lost at school 1&2

Lost at school by Ross Greene

Take a look at some of the judgments we like to make:

·         He just wants his own way.  Again, says Greene, we all want our own way, and most of us are able to complete it adaptively.  But that requires skills often found lacking in these kids.

·         He just wants attention. Greene says we all want attention.

Children are seeking attention in maladaptive way.

·         He’s manipulating us.  Greene responses about behaviorally challenged kids described as being manipulative are those least capable to pulling it off.

Various skills requires manipulation — forethought, planning, impulse control and organization — which are characteristically lacking in these children. 

·         He’s not motivated.  Greene finds this to be a form of the old “kids do well if they want to,” which he contends ought to be reframed as “kids do well if they can.” 

·         He has a bad attitude.  Greene say,  he probably didn’t start out with one, and “bad attitudes” tend to be the by-product of countless years of being misunderstood and over punished by adults who didn’t recognize a kid lacking crucial thinking skills.  Kids are resilient, he thinks; they come around if we start doing the right thing.

·        He’s making bad choices.  Greene question if kids are able to make good choices.

·        His parents are incompetent disciplinarians.  It fails to take into account the fact that most challenging kids have well-behaved siblings.  And this statement doesn’t help anyone at school deal effectively with the child while he’s in the building.

·        He has a mental illness.  Even if the child meets diagnostic criteria and may even benefit from psychotropic medication, Greene feels this description is a nonstarter.  “Mentally ill” is a limiting way to describe people with social, emotional and behavioral challenges.  Call it “problems in living,” and assist in teaching adaptive thinking.

·         His brother was the same way.   So it’s the gene pool.  But we can’t do anything about that, and chances are his brother lacked the same important thinking skills.

Question for the group:

·         1. What was your reaction to the incident involving Joey introduced in the first chapter? Who seems to be suffering in this narrative? Why?

2. Do you believe anyone was at fault for what happened? Do you think any of the staff members could have reacted differently to Joey?

Lost at School, ch.1-2

This book is providing a new insight on challenging kids.  When I read the story about Joey, the boy who runs out of the school because he did not understand what he was supposed to do, I was shocked.  I could not believe what I was reading. I thought it was alarming, horrifying; I had so many feelings reading that part.  I can understand Joey in that he felt embarrassed and he did not want to feel on the spot.  The fact that Joey reacted in such a way proves that he is lacking a skill.  It is also a paradox as he didn't want to talk to the teacher or administrator because everyone was looking at him but then he ran away from school and got even more attention.  The felt saddened to think that this all happened because he did not understand the task at hand.  I am curious to see how Joey can learn the skills he needs to avoid another such episode and increase his productivity.  I especially enjoyed and learned a lot from chapter 2, which main focus was that kids do well if they can.  The author is right that adults often think that children do well if they want to and we contribute much of their issue to motivation.  I like that the author gave a real example of the skills and unsolved problems because it really allowed me to understand what he meant and apply it.  I currently work as a paraprofessional in a first grade class.  There is one student who is challenging and often cannot sit still on the rug and talks out of turn.  I am guilty of using the phrase, "how many times do I have to tell you" and I've heard it countless times in classrooms.  Looking at it from a new perspective, I understand that it has more to do with a skill.  Many of the students are still 5 and 6 years old so it is possible they need to develop the skill of sitting on their spot and raising their hand. My question to my group is, is there a time that you can relate to having these types of responses, and do you think about it any differently after reading these first two chapters?

Lost at School by Ross Greene

Hello Friends!

Hope you are enjoying your weekend.

This week we start our next discussion book "Lost at School". Please find below our weekly reading schedule and posting comment about the book as we read.  

Best,

Ariel --

{READING ITINERATY}

Week of October 17 -23 | Chapters 1 & 2

Questions and Responses by Oct. 24

Week of October 25 – 30 | Chapters 3 & 4

Questions and Responses by Oct. 31

Week of November 1 –  6 | Chapters 5 & 6

Questions and Responses by Nov. 7

Week of November 8 – 13 | Chapters 7 & 8

Questions and Responses by Nov. 14

Week of November 15 – 20 | Chapter 9

Questions and Responses by Nov. 21

*** Lost at School individual reflection paper is due on November 22 ***

post 2

How does Jack change over the course of the novel?

I believe Jack initially spends time with Auggie only because Mr. Tushman asks him to. At the beginning, Jack is extremely conscious of his popularity and social standing at school, and says a lot of things he does not mean in order to be friends with Julian and his crowd. After he loses Auggie's friendship, though, Jack realizes where his priorities should lie. The moment when he punches Julian is a turning point for Jack; he establishes his allegiance at last, and rises above the petty fighting that Julian tries to start. Instead, Jack wants to do the right thing and be kind.

How are masks important in Wonder?

Throughout his childhood, Auggie has loved wearing a mask because a mask allows him to hide his deformity. He wore his astronaut helmet all day, every day when he was younger, and he loves Halloween because he gets to wear a mask and pretend that he is someone else. But as Auggie's dad reminds him at the end of the novel, Auggie may not like his face, but it is who he is; several characters -- particularly members of Auggie's family -- love every part of Auggie, including his face. Masks can hide who you really are, but sometimes it is better to be your true self.

POST #4 {W O N D E R}

PART VIII --

1. Auggie has matured, we could see it in different scenes on Part VIII (A) when he asked to his mom for a new duffel because the one that he had Star Warrs stuff is printed on it. (B) When he decided not to take his teddy bear “Baboo” with him and that note that he left to his mom, that says  it all! (C) When for the first time he leaves home to a school trip, it’s like he leaves his comfort zone to an out the box zone, and (D) the way Auggie handled Eddie’s insults compares to his reactions in the past on same circumstances.

2. Auggie recognizes that it is important to be known. He will no longer hide himself from people’s sight.

4 - Emblematic moments: (A) The fight in the hood, Julian's friends now stand up for Auggie. It shows that they accepted Auggie as one of their own), (B) the time of graduation that marks the end of one stage of development and the beginning of a new one.

Question | Julian is the only character who does not learn a lesson about kindness at the end of this book. Why did Palacio choose not to have him change?

Last post

Ever since I picked up this book I couldn't put it down. I even told my younger sister to read it because it teaches you a lot of things. Like how to be compassionate, how to be kind to one another because you don't know what battles the other person is fighting. It teaches you to really not judge a book by its cover, and how you can also teach the upcoming generation to be acceptable of everyone even IF they are different and by different I don't just mean looks or disability. I mean if people are into different hobbies or having different friends,for example when Summer took the courage to sit with Augie. Everyone questioned her decision, and that's what we have to teach the upcoming generation it doesn't matter what we look like on the outside that's not what matters. I think this will be a great book to introduce to children. I absolutely LOVED the end to this book,  I felt the joy in my heart for Augie just imagined how he felt going up on stage to receive his award. It's amazing how much courage it took from his part to continue to go to school after multiple humiliations, but he pushed through and he excelled. We need to embrace everyone's ability, and never underestimate. As a future educator, I will try my best to implement all of these issues that came up in this book. Someone I enjoyed was mr.Brownes precepts. I liked them because it made the students think about not only school but also how to better there own character and person. This book will give anyone inspiration, and I think that reading this book made me realize how to react in certain situations. I will definitely use this book in the future. "Be the change you want to see in the world" - Gandhi

Wonder - last post

In response to Tiffany's question about Julian, I think it was probably the right decision for his parents to take him out of the school.  He was mean to Auggie and did not even try to befriend him.   Even the kids who were friends with Julian were being nice to Auggie and even defended him at the retreat.  In addition, Julian didn't go to the retreat or participate in school events.  Therefore,  he may be more comfortable elsewhere.  As a bonus, Auggie will have much more peace next year in school.

When Auggie and Jack were getting bullied by those seventh graders in the woods, it was nice that Henry and Amos came back to help them.  They could've just as easily left them and looked out for themselves but they didn't.  In addition to bullying Auggie and Jack, this boy, Eddie, was bullying boys who were significantly younger than him.  Perhaps he gets bullied at home or at school by older kids but it was not right on so many levels.  Also, it's one thing to say something to Auggie, he seems to handle himself well when people stare or make comments but the boys were scared and Eddie provoked the fear.  I felt bad that he lost his hearing aid but I'm glad that he had people who had his back.

At graduation, I thought it was appropriate that Auggie got an award. Like his mother said at the end, he really is a wonder.  He touches everyone and brings people together.  I am proud of Auggie for being brace and going to school, for not quitting when he was getting bullied constantly, and for making the best out of his middle school experience.  I especially felt proud at the end when he was taking pictures with all his friends and he said he wasn't worried about his face, he was just happy and smiling.  It shows how far he has come.  I'm excited for the next school year for Auggie, especially with Julian gone, and all his new friends, I have no doubt he will have a great and fulfilling year.  What do you guys think is in store for Auggie?

Wonder (Pt. 8)

Hello Group,

I think Auggie was very brave to attend the Nature Retreat with his classmates. I loved how he told his mother he would write them (even though he was only going for a few days.) He ended up having such a wonderful time that he didn't need the book to help him sleep and didn't have the chance to write the letters for his parents.

"Dear mom,  I won't need Bamboo,  but if you miss me,  you can cuddle with him yourself." (256). Throughout this story Auggie has really grown up and shown such strength, courage,  and love.

On the final day of the retreat when Jack, Amos, Auggie… etc. are in the woods I was sad for Auggie. When that boy Eddie starts to make fun of him like "what happened to your face,  I didn't know we were watching Lord of the Rings tonight." Or refering to him as an Alien,  and Freddie Krueger. That was really cruel and throughout the entire story Auggie has been mistreated for the wsy he looks. He cannot control the way he looks and he has a beautiful spirit. Jack defends Auggie and Eddie starts calling Auggie his boyfriend,  and a bunch of freaks. Eddie was really being an bully and he shoved Jack down to the ground for no reason at all. When Eddie yanks Auggie's hoodie Amos becomes very upset and charges Eddie (the big bully.) Jack was really happy that Amos and the other boys came back to help them out.

I felt so bad when Auggie lost his hearing aids. I was so disappointed that the big bully Eddie would vandalize Auggie's hearing aids.

Auggie's mom is so supportive. She tells Auggie to not allow the bad experience with Eddie the bully and his friends (and you don't lrt those thugs ruin your trip; pg. 276) She is always finding a positive way to support Auggie's self-esteem,  which I love about her. Mr. Tushman also stricks me as someone very supportive in Auggie's life (outside of his parents,  and sister Via.) His graduation speech about Kindness was wonderful. When Auggie when's the award for his strength my eyes became watery. Such a happy ending.

Questions for the group: 

What did you think about how the story ended?

Do you think Eddie's behavior is a result of something he is dealing with at home?

How do you feel about the decision Julian's parents made taking him out of Beecher Prep?

Wonder: part three

In this part the book we read it in the perspective of Summer Augies first lunch partner. I love how she stands up for Augie in saying that he is a nice kid, because she sees there's more to him than his physical appearance. It also took a lot of courage and character for her to not want to be in the "popular group" or be involved with a "popular guy" which in most cases I think at that age kids are peer pressured to be "popular". I also enjoyed reading the part where her mom and Augies parents got to know each other. This meant that their friendship was genuine and that was bound to last. Throughout this part Summer showed her loyalness to being Augies friend and the part I enjoyed the most was at the end of the chapter when she didn't tell jack Augies secret. She just gave him a hint, where also in most cases at that age gossips spreads and there really are no secrets. In addition I'm glad that Augie was able to find a friend like Summer who stood up for her friend even if he wasn't present. As a 5th grader I saw the opposite in school, if you told a person you thought was your "friend" the next day it was all around the school, that's why I always stayed to myself and had very few "friends". This also taught me that we have to encourage our students to own they're decisions, I say this because a lot of kids may feel someway on the inside but act out in order to "fit in". For example Jack, the other boys were talking about Augie and he probably felt if he had defended him he would have been categorized as those things too.

POST #3 {W O N D E R}

Part 5, 6, and 7...

·        Justin and Miranda are going through family issues that make their lives difficult. Both of them feel comfortable to be surrounded with the Pullman family who it is a loving, caring, and united family that has remained completely integral despite the struggles presented by Auggie’s condition.

·         While Via is trying not to invite her parents and brother to her school event because she doesn’t want anyone notice about her brother syndrome. Ironically, Miranda used Auggie’s condition as an excuse to attract the attention of all the children in the summer camp and become the “popular girl” stating that Auggie is her brother and talked about his deformity.

·         Previously, Auggie forgave Jack for talking behind his back and became friends. Now, Via and Miranda put their differences aside and they are now friends. Act of forgiveness is present in the entire book.

·         In Part Six, I perceived a more mature Auggie, and a little more confident. Maybe it is because everyone at his school finally accepted him as he truly is [Don’t judge a boy by his face].

·         It was really generous of Miranda to pretend to be sick, so Via will take on her role. Since Miranda was her friend when they were children. Miranda perfectly felt that it was the moment for her friend to shine and be on the spotlight, but on the eyes of her parents. Miranda successfully accomplished her goal.

QUESTION | On Part Five, Miranda told Justin that “the universe has not been kind to Auggie.” What are your thoughts about her statement? Do you agree or disagree? Why?

Wonder: (Part 5-7)

I really enjoyed reading Part 5,6, and 7.

In response to Wendy:  I personally didn't agree with Miranda saying she was Auggie's sister without speaking of Via. I felt as if she used him to be popular. A small part of me also understands why she did. She has a lot going on with her own parents she felt as if Auggie's family was her own in a sense.

 In response to Liliana:  I don't see Auggie as disabled but I do see him as different. He is in a talented & gifted school and is doing really well academically so I just think he is being labeled by parents & peers inappropriately.

Justin it handled meeting Auggie (for the first time very well. Although he noticed what everyone else did but treated Auggie nicely. He got to know Auggie and I'm glad Via has someone she can share how she feels with. When Justin defends Jack against Julian and the other boys it showed that he is really a nice guy. He noticed how Jack was treated in the store and scared the boys later on. I thought that was so funny. I love how he says:

"Olivia reminds me of a bird sometimes, her feathers get all ruffled when she is mad. And when she is fragile like this she's a little lost bird looking for a nest.  So I give her my wing to hide under." (203).

This is so sweet. Via has been through so much with Auggie's condition and feeling overlooked by her parents. She still is a good big sister but is experiencing her own obstacles in life and needs someone in her corner to lean on. If I'm not mistaken he spoke of his "tic" calming down?  Does Justin have something that causes him to have some type of condition?

I was also surprised how well Auggie handled Daisy's death. It seemed so sudden and sad but he was very mature & strong about it. When Auggie realizes Via didn't want her high-school friends knowing what Auggie looks like he becomes very upset. I think this is a point in the story showing how Auggies appearance has become the center of arguments and frustration. It's really sad because he cannot help how he looks. I was glad that he did get to go to the play and reconnect with Miranda.

Miranda is quite interesting to me. She lies about being Auggie's sister. Even if you have spent so much time playing with him and being at his house it doesn't give her the right to lie about it. I wish her and Via were still close. She seems like she really misses her friendship. She even speaks about not feeling safe in her own home but feeling safe at Auggie's house. It was really sad that neither of het parents could attend opening night in support of her (not even Zack)  so she pretends to be sick and Via takes her spot. I was really shocked, I think it's the start to rekindling their friendship. When Via puts her arm over her shoulders I smiled.

Questions for group: 

What do you think about Miranda pretending to be sick before the start of the play?

Do you think Justin did the right thing by approaching Julian and the other boys after he seen how they treated Jack?

Reading Itinerary {W O N D E R}

Week of September 27 – October 2 | Part 5, 6 and 7

Questions and Responses by Oct. 3

Week of October 4 – 9 | Part 8

Questions and Responses by Oct. 10

*** Wonder INDIVIDUAL reflection paper is due on October 14 ***

Wonder part three

Wow!  This book continues to amaze me.  We get a lot of insight about Via's boyfriend and her friend.  First, I would like to point out the way the author typed Justin's part.  It makes it seem like a teenager is writing it and it seems authentic.  Justin seems like a sweet kid who cares for Via and her brother geninuely.  I thought his reaction to Auggie was good and his interactions with him.  He does not try to exclude him.  Also, he continues to see Via after meeting Auggie which is clearly an important part of her life.  It was sad when Via told him that some kids wouldn't be friends with her or come to her birthday parties because he was going to be there.  One question I pose is about the very end of Justin's part, in which he says that the universe make it all even out.  The universe takes care of all of its birds. What do you guys think about this?  Do you think the universe makes the bad and good even out and ultimately takes care of us in the end?

The next part is from Auggie's perspective.  He talks about getting stared at by all the parents at the same time during school functions.  I feel bad for him because I can relate to feeling stared at or knowing that people are talking about you.  Obviously not on such a large scale like Auggie but if it makes anyone uncomfortable to get stared at or talked about, Auggie must feel worse.  I think it's interesting, as Auggie points out, that his parents, Jack's parents and Summer's parents all form their own group while Julian, Miles, and Henry's parents form their own group.  It was so sad when Diasy died.  But this made me think about what Justin said about the universe.  Even though Auggie does not have Daisy anymore, he still has a loving and supportive family.

Finally, Miranda talks about what happened to her since the summer which explains a lot about her relationship with Via.  In the beginning we learn that Via and her best friend Miranda have grown a part.  Miranda has changed her appearance and the people she hangs out with. We learn that the reason for Miranda's changes is that her parents are getting divorced and her father has remarried.  This is a lot for anyone especially a teenager that is growing up and has issues of her own.  Many kids lash out and manifest their anger and frustration when their parents get divorced.  Miranda has a special place for Auggie and really cares for him.  I did not feel comfortable with her when she told kids at her camp that her brother was deformed.  Auggie isn't her brother.  Although she has been in his life since she was so young, I still do not think she had the right to do that.  My question to the group is do you think that it was in her right to say Auggie was her brother?

THE END OF WONDER

Wow. All I can say is wow. This book is absolutely amazing and so much happened from part three and on. At first I was very upset with Jack, because of what he said during Halloween about Auggie. However, the fact that he apologized and actually wanted to be friends with him and he didn't care what people said about him showed that he was being more mature about the everything.

A second thing I want to note is how Auggie handled Daisy's death. I can relate to this because I had a cat named Perla for 18 years, last June I had to put her to sleep and it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I shared so much with her and "pets" actually become family. So I know exactly how Via and Auggie felt. That part of the book was bittersweet.

A third thing I want to note is how the "war" ended and everything, in a way, backfired on Julian. Everyone became friends with Jack and Auggie and they actually protected him. The way they all protected him during the school trip during the movie night. I couldn't believe that Edward and his friends were making fun of Auggie, but I wonder what would've happened if no one came to help Jack and Auggie.

Another thing I want to note is that I felt like it was so disrespectful when one of the parents complained about Auggie being accepted into Beecher, and how it wasn't an inclusion school. This made me upset because Auggie is not considered special needs, nor is he "academically challenged" and he is not considered disabled. I just felt like it was an ignorant thing to say or to point out

Overall this book made me think about a lot of things and what I take from this book is kindness, respect, and love. I loved how they made August feel so happy the day of graduation and gave him a standing ovation. As I as reading it made me smile, and I felt like I was there cheering him on. I could imagine how happy he was. One thing I would've liked was to see a picture of August. Even if it was a drawing. Now some questions I have for you guys are:

1- What do YOU believe a wonder is? Do you agree that Auggie is a wonder?
2- Do you think August is "disabled" or "special needs"? Why or why not?
3- What did you learn from this book, and how will you carry that into your personal life and classrooms?

Hello October!

One of the things that make this book so special to me, are some of the quotes or precepts this story included. For instance, Mr. Browne’s October precept:

“Your deeds are your monuments.”

[Inscription on an Egyptian tomb]

For me, it means that our actions are those that mark our lives. We are the pens our own history or destiny. People might not know the reasons of why we made all those decisions, but we do not have to give explanations. We just have to focus on doing what we really want and make us happy, as long as we don’t hurt anyone. Learn from mistakes and the person who recognize the good we have done is the person who appreciates us. What are your personal thoughts about this precept?